Sexual orientation
Sexual orientation can be one of the most difficult parts of ourselves to talk about and understand.
What is sexual orientation?
Sexual orientation refers to the gender (or genders) of the people we are attracted to, both emotionally and physically. This is an important part of our total self-identity: how we see ourselves and how others see us.
Definitions
- Heterosexual: a person who has feelings of affection and attraction, both emotionally and physically, to people of the opposite gender (sex). Sometimes called “straight”.
- Homosexual: a person who has feelings of affection and attraction, both emotionally and physically, to people of the same gender (sex).
- Gay: preferred term for a homosexual male. “Gay” is a term that is used by many people to describe anyone who is not heterosexual.
- Lesbian: preferred term for a homosexual female.
- Bisexual: a person who has feelings of affection and attraction, both emotionally and physically, to both men and women. Sometimes called “bi”.
- Transgender: a person who identifies as belonging to a different sex and who feels the need to live that way. A transgender person has not had gender reassignment or a sex change.
- Transsexual: A person who has changed their sex physically or a person who is making that transition through medical treatment or surgery. This transformation is usually irreversible.
- Questioning: A person who is unsure about their sexual orientation or gender identity and is in the process of exploring the issue.
When does do you discover your sexual orientation?
Coming to understand your sexual orientation can happen at any time during your life, from when you first become sexually aware to much later in life. Feelings of attraction can be confusing, and this is quite normal. There is no time limit on discovering your sexual orientation.
You are the only one who will know your sexual orientation. No one can talk you into being someone you are not. You will learn to trust what feels right for you.
If you have questions about your sexual orientation, ask yourself . . .
- When I have sexual dreams or fantasies, are they about someone of the same sex?
- Have I ever had a crush or been in love with someone of the same sex?
- Do I feel that I am “different” or that I have “a funny feeling” when I am around certain friends of the same gender(sex)?
- Are my feelings for people of the same sex true and clear?
If you cannot answer these questions now, don’t worry. You will be more certain in time. You and only you know how to see yourself correctly.
This item was last modified on June 12, 2015